Day 164

It was one of those days....stressful because you know what is to come that day. I didn't want to spoil Weston's father day by being weepy and going to visit my fathers grave, so I took the girls there today instead. I had never imagined that this holiday could be so hard. I kept having this thought of not having a dad here any more.... and the whole 'it's not fair' thing kept popping in my head here and there. I just kept pushing it aside and saying to myself 'what happened was supposed to happen.' But it was a nice visit there. I wasn't extremely weepy and we left a flower arrangement and some balloons in honor of him. And then the girls and I sat there eating a snack and talking about all that we could remember about him. Ella couldn't remember much about him except him being sick and in the hospital, since she was there with me during everything....which made me sad. But there were lots of good, happy memories shared and the girls wanted me to keep telling them every story that I could think of about him and me. It was nice, but I felt exhausted and just wanted to get home afterwards. And I am SO grateful to have had 'The World's Greatest Dad!'